11/365

My whole life, as far as I can remember, I've been taught not to settle. And so it was peculiar that when it came time to come up with my word for 2010, the one that came immediately and powerfully to mind was "settle"--and I knew exactly why. Within six months, I'll have moved yet again (d.v.), and I'm grappling with a lot of restlessnesses, right alongside a lot of budding stabilities and joys, some of which are just now peeping out their heads to see whether it's safe to come out and become full-blown wonders. I'm letting this word work its way through my life right now, seeing the ways in which it makes contact with my biggest questions, illuminates some desires, makes sense of some reluctances, foregrounds some hopes. This kind of self-cultivation is, to my mind, exactly what these last few days of winter vacation are for.